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  #16  
Old February 13th, 2011, 12:48 PM
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Re: “पगली ” –भ्रमर –हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

ये तो साला कचरे वाली पे लाइन मारता है !!!
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  #17  
Old February 13th, 2011, 03:51 PM
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Re: “पगली ” –भ्रमर –हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

Quote:
Originally Posted by chitrala View Post
बुरा मत मानियेगा भरमार साहिब.... एक अौर चालू कविता फिर एक नये थ्रेड में... नकारात्मक मत प्रदान कर रहा हूँ... पुरानी लोमड़ी बुरा तो नहीं मानेगी...
Chitralaji ... has he posted before? I don't think so. I enjoyed tukbandhi of this kavita.



Quote:
Originally Posted by shuklabhramar5 View Post
चित्राला सर जी सेम थ्रेड को कैसे प्रयोग करें कल भी उपाय पूछा था हमें बताया नहीं कृपया बताएं और नकारात्मक की जगह प्रोत्साहन दीजिये कविता में ध्यान दे चालू नहीं है पगली की जिंदगानी है आँखों देखी सधन्यवाद

सुरेन्द्रशुक्लाभ्रमर
Thanks. + rep coming your way for an excellent effort. Kindly bolden next time ... due to some strange reason ... Hindi fonts are hard to read or could just be my laptop screen adjustment.

We have one of India's best poet at this site (he also does shero-shayari) ... stay long enough for us to introduce you two.



Quote:
Originally Posted by raniraja View Post
ये तो साला कचरे वाली पे लाइन मारता है !!!
RRbhai ... we are so pleasant to each other ... a new members needs encouragement and not disparaging remarks. For shure you enjoyed this short poem ... noh? Yes? Yes it is.
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बुरे फसें 'मजाल', आ कर जन्नत में ... हमने तो सोचा था, कुछ नया होता होगा!
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  #18  
Old February 13th, 2011, 03:53 PM
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Re: “पगली ” –भ्रमर –हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

Quote:
Originally Posted by shuklabhramar5 View Post
पगली ” – भ्रमर हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .
पगली इतना
गट्ठर बांधे ,
गली गली
मुस्काते चलती ,
आँखों से वो
करे इशारे ,
नैन मटक्का ,
फटी हुई धोती
से अपने ,
गली बुहारे ,
दरवाजे जा -
खड़ी गाड़ियों ,
के शीशे में
खुद को देखे ,
चमकाए फिर
कमर नचाये ,
बल खाते -
लहरा के चलती ,

पगली इतना
गट्ठर बांधे ,
गली गली
मुस्काते चलती ,

उसका घर था ,
बेटे बेटी ,
बातें करती
आसमान से ,
उनसे लडती
खड़ा सामने ,
कोई भी -
ना देखा करती ,
श्मशान में
जाकर सोती ,
पल दो पल
जी भर के रोती ,
फिर अपना वो
गट्ठर बांधे ,
चली शहर में -
आया करती ,

पगली इतना
गट्ठर बांधे ,
गली गली
मुस्काते चलती

गिला शिकवा ,
किस्से भी - वो
कूड़ा करकट -
कुत्तों के संग
भाग दौड़कर ,
रोटी अपना -
खाया करती

पगली इतना
गट्ठर बांधे ,
गली गली
मुस्काते चलती

सुरेंद्रशुक्लाभ्रमर

१३ .२ .११ जल (पी बी ) ४ .४५ पूर्वाह्न
Quoting for prosperity.
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Jamke Dushmani Karo Humse ... Magar Bas Itni Gunjaesh Hai Aapse
Kal Agar Hum Dost Ban Jaayen ... To Sharminda Na Ho!


LLKC ... pure and unadulterated ... LLKC!

दूर से देखने पर तो यही लगता था ... 'वाह! वहाँ क्या मजा होता होगा!'
बुरे फसें 'मजाल', आ कर जन्नत में ... हमने तो सोचा था, कुछ नया होता होगा!
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  #19  
Old February 13th, 2011, 06:12 PM
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Re: “पगली ” –भ्रमर –हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

this one written by my relative..
धुंध के आवरण में सिमटा मन बरस बरस जाए ।
नदिया सा चँचल मनहर मौसम
इठलाते रँगों सा छिटक छिटक जाए ।
अलसाता यौवन मौजों की पुकार पर
बिखराए केशों सा लहर लहर जाए ।

Last edited by sarv_shaktimaan; February 14th, 2011 at 08:49 PM. Reason: गल्तियां सुधार रहा था.
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  #20  
Old February 14th, 2011, 07:44 AM
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Re: “पगली ” –भ्रमर –हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

Quote:
Originally Posted by tantric_yogi View Post
...
...

We have one of India's best poet at this site (he also does shero-shayari) ... stay long enough for us to introduce you two.


...
Mushkil se... bahut mushkil se... ek do poem bana kar yaha post karta hoon yaar... bas aur tum ne toh mujhe India's best poet ka title de diya. Aap toh hume sharminda kar rahe hai
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  #21  
Old February 14th, 2011, 08:05 AM
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shuklabhramar5 shuklabhramar5 is offline
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Re: “पगली ” –भ्रमर –हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

Quote:
Originally Posted by Sane Less View Post
Mushkil se... bahut mushkil se... ek do poem bana kar yaha post karta hoon yaar... bas aur tum ne toh mujhe India's best poet ka title de diya. Aap toh hume sharminda kar rahe hai

Tantrik yogi ji, sane less, n sharv saktimaan thanx for your nice comments ...v r here to learn till our last breath ...if any criticism or advice ...downthumbs should be in the language which can be read by all ..by our family members ..there are way to say ur feelings ..i hv not find it in RAJA RANI AND AMTHALAL ..i may be right or wrong ...Pagli me ek saty sajiv chitran hai jo hamne ..Jammu and Kashmir me dekha ...milavat nahi hai bs ek apni bhasha me abhivyakti hai I have not decorated it as ppl commented .....
Shuklabhramar
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  #22  
Old February 14th, 2011, 10:30 AM
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Re: “पगली ” –भ्रमर –हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

Quote:
Originally Posted by tantric_yogi View Post
Chitralaji ... has he posted before? I don't think so. I enjoyed tukbandhi of this kavita.

.
Jogijee, long time... when are you going to join us full time again? what's keeping you busy, Is it seth ji's problems or nature's missed calls?
Bharmaar sahib is here for 4 odd days and he has already started 4-5 threads, one for each of his poems... I humbly requested him to post all of them in one thread. but... and he himself admitted of being an old fox.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sarv_shaktimaan View Post
this one written by my relative..
धुंध के आवऱण में सिमटा मन बऱस बऱस जाए ।
नदिया सा चँचल मनहर मौसम
इठलाते रँगों सा छिटक छिटक जाए ।
अलसाता यौवन मौजों की पुकार पर
बिखराए केशों सा लहर लहर जाए ।
Your dad's? You mentioned once that your dad used to write... good one... use of classic roopak, utpreksha and upma alankaar. respect.
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  #23  
Old February 14th, 2011, 11:50 AM
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Re: “पगली ” –भ्रमर –हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

[quote=chitrala;543187]Jogijee, long time... when are you going to join us full time again? what's keeping you busy, Is it seth ji's problems or nature's missed calls?
Bharmaar sahib is here for 4 odd days and he has already started 4-5 threads, one for each of his poems... I humbly requested him to post all of them in one thread. but... and he himself admitted of being an old fox.


Chitrala ji perhaps u have not pay your attention I have humbly asked you how to keep continuing on same thread ..just tell me steps..in this case can all see all individual titles of my different poems ??
suppose i have to continue in thread PATANG .....further what steps???

Jogi ji welcome ..pls come n join let us learn ...teri yaad jo aati hai ....
Bhramar ....
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  #24  
Old February 14th, 2011, 12:01 PM
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Re: “पगली ” –भ्रमर –हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

Quote:
Originally Posted by shuklabhramar5 View Post


Chitrala ji perhaps u have not pay your attention I have humbly asked you how to keep continuing on same thread ..just tell me steps..in this case can all see all individual titles of my different poems ??
suppose i have to continue in thread PATANG .....further what steps???

Jogi ji welcome ..pls come n join let us learn ...teri yaad jo aati hai ....
Bhramar ....
I had... and I told you... Just post your poems like you post your replies(go to Go advanced/quote)... And request the mods to change the title of the Thread to "A collection of hindi poems by Bhramar"... You can change the post title yourself.... Or sooner or later some mod would bundle all your poems in one thread with funny tiltle(ask Budmaas pai or Desibaawra pai). You can put link to your blog with admin's permission and it can feature in "sites we recommend".
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  #25  
Old February 14th, 2011, 09:02 PM
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Re: “पगली ” –भ्रमर –हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

Quote:
Originally Posted by chitrala View Post
j
your dad's? You mentioned once that your dad used to write... Good one... Use of classic roopak, utpreksha and upma alankaar. Respect.
मुझे हिन्दी कविता के अनेक ढांचों और स्वरूपों का इतना ज्ञान तो नहीं है परन्तु पढ़ने का शौक काफी है.. विश्लेषण और सराहना के लिए शुक्रिया..
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  #26  
Old February 14th, 2011, 09:48 PM
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Re: “पगली ” –भ्रमर –हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

What's Gat-thar?
I didn't understand it in either normal type or bold type (curtsy TY)
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  #27  
Old February 15th, 2011, 12:29 AM
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Re: “पगली ” –भ्रमर –हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

[quote=chitrala;543244]I had... and I told you... Just post your poems like you post your replies(go to Go advanced/quote)... And request the mods to change the title of the Thread to "A collection of hindi poems by Bhramar"...

Thanx Chitrala ji , i shall try frm now onwards ..req u to help me to bundle my poems ..with different titles so .ppl can search by title...

Sarv shaktiman ji thanx kavita me gahrayi gaagar me saagar usme doobne vale he dekh paate hain ..aap to unme se hain hi..

Rational thinker ji badi mushkil hai hindi me likho to bahut log padh nahi paate..english me hindi log padh to lete hain par samajhna mushkil ..karen to kya ..max ppl can read it english who attend net ...e charcha..
so writing in poetry now ...ya chitrala ji jo sujhayen.....

aapne jo poochha Gat-thar .. it is called in hindi "POTLI" ..a cloth where we can put many things and bind it ..u hv seen sellers binding cloths ..utensils in a cloth ..moving keeping on their heads ..
similarly my characters--- Paagal or Pagali ..do the same they put many unwanted things cloth, paper,garbage and love them carry them ..saath saath liye liye mar jaate hain.....

Bhramar
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‘दादी’ –‘माँ’ -सपने ना मुझको
सच की तू तावीज बंधा दे
हंसती रह तू दादी अम्मा
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  #28  
Old February 15th, 2011, 09:27 AM
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A collection of hindi poems (kavita) by "bhramar" “पगली,पतंग,नारी,‘चंदा को देख मन”

[quote=shuklabhramar5;543001]“ पगली, पतंग, नारी,
“चंदा को देख मन ” भ्रमर हिंदी पोएम्स (कविता )
सागर सा शांत मन ,
सदियों से क्लांत मन ,
गहराई नाप नाप ,
पर्वत से लड़ा मन ,
मोती को देख देख ,
डूबे - उतराए ..
उछले - इतराए ,
अब तक का खारा मन
मीठा हो जाये
‘चंदा ’ को देख - देख
लहर …लहर जाये >>>>


कल –कल करे नदी ,
सूरज की किरणों से
स्वर्णिम सजी नदी
चट्टानों से लड़ी ,
झरनों से आ गिरी ,
सोने व् चांदी के
खानों से गुजरी
रुकी नहीं -थमी नहीं
चलती ही जाये
सागर की बाँहों में
गोता लगाये …
प्रियतम ‘आगोश ’ में
खोयी चली जाए ….


‘चंदा ’ को देख कुछ
गीत गुनगुनाये …
लहर …लहर जाये >>>>


अंधकार देख -देख
दुनिया में भटका मन
व्यग्र -उग्र -एकाकी -
अंधड़ से उजड़ा मन
देख एक रौशनी
खिंचा चला जाये
‘दिया ’ जला देख मन
दिवाली मनाये …
‘चंदा ’ को देख मन
हीरे व् चांदी सा
चमक -चमक जाये >>>>


शरमाई सी कली
बंधन -जकड़ी पली-
फूलों को देख - देख
खिलने को ‘पंखुरी ’
मद से भरी - बढ़ी
कांटो को देख संग
सहमी डरी कली
भौंरे को देख
फिर साहस जुटाए
खिली चली जाये …
‘चंदा ’ को देख मन -
-कमल
खिला खिला जाये >>>>>


मेरा किशोर मन
‘पिजरे ’ से मुक्त मन
हरियाली झरनों में
फूलों व् कलियों में
खेतों व् बगियों में
प्यारी सी गलियों में
सागर की लहरों में
नदियों व् झीलों में
ढूंढता फिरे -कोई -
बुलबुल व् हंसिनी
कोयल व् मोरनी
प्यारी सी संगिनी
मोती चुगे ये मन ..
“हंस ’ बना !
“गोरी ” की पायल -
की थिरकन सुने
-तो मन -
गाने को गीत ,
व्यग्र –आकुल -
हुआ ये मन ..
पीपल के पत्तों
सा शोर मचाये ..
‘आम ’ सा बौराए ..
आई “बसंती ”-
ने -मन ललचाये
ये !
तड़फडाये ..
पंख फड़फडाये ..
उड़ा चला जाये >>>>


‘चंदा ’ को देख मन
हहर –हहर जाये .


सुरेंद्रशुक्ला ”भ्रमर ”
७ .३० पूर्वाह्न
१५ .२ .११ जल ( पी. बी. )
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‘दादी’ –‘माँ’ -सपने ना मुझको
सच की तू तावीज बंधा दे
हंसती रह तू दादी अम्मा
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  #29  
Old February 16th, 2011, 12:37 AM
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shuklabhramar5 shuklabhramar5 is offline
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Re: दर्द - भ्रमर का –A COLLECTION OF HINDI POEMS BY BHRAMAR

this may not be taken as reply..

-----4------- title ...दर्द - भ्रमर का .. new creation ..after patang..koyala,naari, pagli , ghav bana nasoor etc.........

दर्द - भ्रमर का
करी कल्पना बेटी की-
चाँद सी सूरज को छू लेगी,
ख़ुशी बड़े थे बाबा माई,
अब रोते -अंखियों में मोती,
बेटी 'धरती' छू न पायी.

दूल्हा- राजा- घोडा बाजा,
महल दुमहले शोर तमाशा,
खुश कितने हैं अम्मा बाबू
फिर 'दहेज़' दानव का कीड़ा
नीबू जैसे उन्हें निचोड़ा,
डर इतना है ह्रदय समाये
रोंती कल - "ना बेटी आये"
डोली पकडे लटके काका
माँ रोंती -दुनिया -शरमाई
डोली उसकी रुक ना पाई.

सुरेन्द्रशुक्ल भ्रमर
७.४४ जालंधर पंजाब
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‘दादी’ –‘माँ’ -सपने ना मुझको
सच की तू तावीज बंधा दे
हंसती रह तू दादी अम्मा
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  #30  
Old February 16th, 2011, 12:44 AM
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shuklabhramar5 shuklabhramar5 is offline
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Re: DARD -A COLLECTION OF HINDI POEMS BY BHRAMAR“पगली ”–भ्रमर–हिंदी पोएम (कविता) .

..........5..........
दर्द- भ्रमर का हिंदी कविता

आने की सुन अपने भाई,
माँ कितना खुश होती,
जब उल्टा हम पैदा होते,
माँ कितना है रोती .

बेटा जब अख़बार में आया,
ख़ुशी बाप ने गले लगाया,
आगे पढता करतूतें जब ,
कैद.. जेल... तो कितना रोया .

सुरेन्द्रशुक्ल भ्रमर
७.४४ जालंधर पंजाब
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