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Friday Special Tickle your funny bone...

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  #31  
Old September 17th, 2015, 11:57 AM
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Re: Haryanvi special

एक बार एक हरियाणा का ताऊ सुबह-2 सोता हुआ मर गया,

ताई उसी टाइम रोटी खा
रही थी...

तभी एक आदमी बाहर से आया और बोला,
ताई तू रोटी खाण लाग री और इन्घे ताऊ मरया पड़ा!


ताई बोली,
बेटा बस दो टुकड़े रह रे, इन्हें
निपटा लू, अर फेर देखिये मेरी चिंगाड|

Last edited by sarv_shaktimaan; February 9th, 2016 at 11:58 AM.
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  #32  
Old November 29th, 2015, 08:23 AM
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Another one from Whatsapp

हरियाणवी छोरा : बापू एक खुशखबरी सै
.
बापू : के?
.
छोरा : तूने कही थी के पास
होग्या तो गाडी दुवाऊँगा
.
बापू : हाँ
.
छोरा : रुपिये बचगे तेरे...
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Last edited by sarv_shaktimaan; July 6th, 2016 at 09:21 PM.
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  #33  
Old November 29th, 2015, 10:32 AM
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Re: Another one from Whatsapp

हरियाणवी लड़की: पासपोर्ट साइज फोटो खींच दे, अर उसमें मेरी नई चप्पल भी आनी चाहिए

फोटोग्राफर बी हरियाणवी था।
बोल्या टट्टी वाली स्टाइल में बैठ जा।


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March 16, 2012: Sachin Tendulkar scores his 100th century in Inter-fucking-national cricket

Sent from my iPhone.

Last edited by sarv_shaktimaan; February 9th, 2016 at 11:58 AM.
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  #34  
Old December 1st, 2015, 09:26 AM
poojasl1 poojasl1 is offline
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Talking Re: Haryanvi special

Really Good........
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  #35  
Old December 1st, 2015, 08:00 PM
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Re: Haryanvi special

Quote:
Originally Posted by poojasl1 View Post
Really Good........
Hope you are not here for spamming
Folks keep a watch
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  #36  
Old December 16th, 2015, 11:46 AM
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Re: Haryanvi special

छोरा: बापू, प्यार एक वायरस है।
बापू: अर् यो किवाड़ पाछै धरया लट्ठ एन्टीवायरस है ...कव्हे तो ईबे तेरा सिस्टम स्कैन करद्यूँ?
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This is quite a game, politics. There are no permanent enemies, and no permanent friends,only permanent interests. - Some Firang

Last edited by sarv_shaktimaan; February 9th, 2016 at 11:58 AM.
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  #37  
Old February 9th, 2016, 11:59 AM
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Re: Haryanvi special

एक हरियाणवी छोरे की दिल्ली की एक
पतली सी लडकी से फ्रेँडशिप हो गई !
उसने लड़की को मैसेज भेजा:
.
.
.
मुखडा भी तेरा ख़ास कोन्या ;
हड्डियों पर तेरे माँस कोन्या;
प्रपोज तैने मैं क्या ख़ाक करूं बावली;
तेरी तो वैलनटाई डे तक जीने की
आस कोन्या!"...
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  #38  
Old February 9th, 2016, 02:20 PM
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Re: Haryanvi special

Punjabi by Nature.

ग्राहक ने होटल के पंजाबी मैनेजर से शिकायत करते हुए कहा,
" कितनी गन्दी सर्विस है ???

एक घंटे से पानी माँग रहा हूँ अब तक नहीं मिला है।"

पंजाबी मैनेजर ने ग्राहक के सामने ही वेटर को बुलाया और
कहा -

"साब इक घंटे तोँ कुत्ते वांगु भौक रहे ने ,
जे थोडा ऐ ही हाल रेहा तां दुबारा केड़ा कंजर साडे होटल चे गू खाण आउगा ...
पाणी लै के आ छेती !
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  #39  
Old February 10th, 2016, 08:19 AM
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Re: Haryanvi special

^^
LoL reminds me of some one saying about a college chai shop owner shouting at his server - 'Sahab yahan chai peene aaye hai ki G Maraane'
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This is quite a game, politics. There are no permanent enemies, and no permanent friends,only permanent interests. - Some Firang
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  #40  
Old February 10th, 2016, 04:46 PM
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Re: Haryanvi special

मुण्डा – कितथे हो ....
कुड़ी – mom dad दे नाल..
. dinner कर रही हां ..
रेडिसन होटल विच ...
घर पहुँच के गल करदी हां.
तुसी कितथे हो ?

मुण्डा – जिस लंगर विच तु खा रही है. ...
मैं तेरे पीछे वाली .
लाइन विच वरता रेहा हां.
दाल चाहिदी होए तां दस देईं..
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  #41  
Old February 11th, 2016, 12:48 PM
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Re: Haryanvi special

अलग अलग गर्ल फ्रेंड के अनुभवः

पहले दिल्ली वाली थी ..
उसको एक बार टेडी बियर गिफ्ट दिया मैंने तो बोली -:
ओ माइ गोड वाऊ सो क्यूट

लुधियाना वाली को दिया तो बोली -:
ओ जी रब दी सौ किन्ना सोना टेडी हा

लखनऊ वाली को देने पर -:
या अल्लाह ..! कितना खूबसूरत है

इस बार नयी गर्ल फ्रेंड हरियाणा की है

हरियाणा वाली को दिया तो बोली -:
"र यो के दे दिया भालू सा"!!
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Last edited by sarv_shaktimaan; February 11th, 2016 at 12:51 PM.
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  #42  
Old February 24th, 2016, 02:50 PM
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Re: Haryanvi special

पंजाबी: आज हमारे मुन्ने ने पहली बार आधा शब्द बोला

पड़ोसी : क्या बोला

पंजाबी: बहन
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  #43  
Old February 24th, 2016, 03:33 PM
Jagmohan Jagmohan is offline
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Re: Haryanvi special

1 लडका लडकियों को घुरते हुए गिर गया तो…..

दिल्ली की लडकी :- लगी तो नहीं आपको ?
पंजाब की कुडी :- चंगा होया तेरे नाल । . . . . . . . . . . . . .

हरियाणा की छोरी :- डेढ के बीज ओर देख ले अपनी बुआ न ।





ले भाईयो जाडा आ गया..
अर्ज किया है--
बैड+रजाई जाडा आ गया है भाई....
अब तो शुरु करो पढाई...
बहुत हो गई मस्ताई.
बात मेरी मान लो भाई..
ताऊ न कह दो मेरी खातिर लादे लुगाई
मेरी तो ठण्डी पड़ी रजाई
थामे पढ लो मेरे भाई
बेरा ना कद गरम होवे गी मेरी रजाई
जिसके इब भी बात समझ मै ना आई
ना तो वो आदमी ना वो लुगाई

______________________________
paav tham nahi rahe the, or sanse chal
nahi rahi thi
anjaan si raaho me, bekhudi hi bekhudi
thi .

Last edited by sarv_shaktimaan; February 24th, 2016 at 06:17 PM. Reason: please use larger font for Hindi script
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  #44  
Old February 24th, 2016, 03:34 PM
Jagmohan Jagmohan is offline
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Re: Haryanvi special

3 इन्जिनियर एक टेढ़े मेढ़े पाइप में से तार डालने कि कोशिश कर रहे थे,

एक Jat 5 दिन से ये सब देख रहा था.

5 वें दिन वो बोला:- मै करू ??

वो बोले:- हम 5 दिन से कोशिश कर रहे हैं, हमसे तो हुआ नहीं, तु कैसे निकालेगा ? चल तु भी कोशिश कर ले......

Jat बोला:- ठीक

Jat खेत मे गया एक चूहा लाया उसकी पूँछ मे तार बान्धा चूहे को पाईप मे डाला, चूहा दुसरी तरफ से तार के साथ बाहर निकल गया|

इन्जिनियर अब तक कोमा में है।


Moral_ Jat always rock"!!

Last edited by sarv_shaktimaan; February 24th, 2016 at 06:18 PM. Reason: user larger font for Hindi script
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  #45  
Old April 23rd, 2016, 06:34 AM
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Re: Haryanvi special

एक बै एक चौधरी साहब की लाटरी लाग गी, अर लाटरी भी थोड़ी नहीं, पूरे 50 करोड़ की लागी। पूरे गोहान्ड मै रुक्का पङग्या अर मीडिया आले चौधरी कै पाच्छै पाच्छै चक्कर काटैं। एक मीडिया आला चौधरी कै मुह आगै माईक लगा कै बोल्या :-

चौधरी साहब। आप नै के बेरा लाग्या के इस नम्बर पै ऐ लाटरी लागै गी?

चौधरी :- जब मैं पहली रात नै सोया तो मन्नै सूपने मैं 8 दिख्या।। अर दूसरी रात नै सोया तो सूपने मै 9 दिख्या।। मन्नै 8 अर 9 की गुणा करकै 53 नम्बर पै लाटरी लगा दी।।

मीडिया आला ( अचम्भे मै ) :- रै चौधरी साहब। यो के कर्या आप नै। 8 अर 9 की गुणा तो 72 होव सै।।

चौधरी साहब :- रै बावलीबूच। तेरै हिसाब तै चालदा तो लाग ली थी लाटरी।।
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Last edited by sarv_shaktimaan; July 6th, 2016 at 09:24 PM.
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